An affirmation for new hosts

This newsletter is a reminder to myself.

As a person who identifies as male, I rarely think, Maybe I shouldn’t. I immediately ask, Why not me? and do it.

But what trips me up is that I don’t always know how to do something and I’m too dense to learn or ask, so I figure things out the hard way. And in that process, I’ve always come up against my own ego or worse, imposter syndrome.

The thought of rejection, that I’m not good enough, that I’m not worth it, these questions are very real obstacles that I still face.

And I knew I faced them when I used to postpone asking for promotions or raises, until I got a new certification or the stars aligned. I knew I faced them when I should have quit a job, but wasn’t confident of my job prospects.

And for the first 7 years of my career as an outdoor host, imposter syndrome prevented me from charging for my hikes. My ego prevented me from asking for help.

So, how do I deal with it?

First, 100% of the credit is due to being a new parent. Whether I like something or not, or whether it makes me feel good or not, it has to be done. If I’m sick, doesn’t matter, baby has to be watched.

Second, I remind myself daily there’s no room for ego in a relationship with a kid involved. So now, I ask everyone for help when I don’t know something. I’m in constant awe of how ignorant I’ve been this whole time I thought I wasn’t.

Third, winning is a numbers game. So rejections aren’t bad as long as I learn why I got rejected and fix it. I no longer have time to even care because it’s my turn to give baby a bath or fix her breakfast. I see an opportunity, give it a shot, wait a while to see if it’s working. If it’s not working, I stop and move on to the next until I find the opportunity that works.

At this point, nothing I do is perfect. It’s just done or not done. I just don’t have the time or bandwidth to care about what my inner voice is saying. (Or some outer voices, for that matter).

Now, each time I start a new project, I no longer have the patience to nurture it until it grows up. It needs to work fast. Because it’s not my “baby”. My actual kid is my “baby”. Everything else is a means to put food on her plate and clothes on her back.

And if you do not have kids, think of it another way. If your peak earning years are in your 20s through 40s, why would you sell that time to some heartless company for a fraction of what you could actually earn from your own time? Isn’t that the same argument you make for owning a home vs renting? That you don’t want to make your landlord rich? So then why make your company rich?

If you’ve been thinking about making a change, this is the universe calling.

If you’re thinking about being an outdoor host, but haven’t gotten around to it yet because [insert default reason here], this is the universe calling.

If you’ve already planned out your trip idea, but got overwhelmed with how to actually start, or register things, or get some kind of permission or promoting your trip, this is the universe calling.

This is not a call to quit your job. But a reminder that my time is limited and so is yours. It’s the most valuable asset we have. When I realized that, I just stopped wasting it on my ego, my imposter syndrome, my inner voices, the outer voices, dead-end jobs or worrying about things I didn’t know.

Instead, I started using it to do more of what I wanted for myself and my family. How will you use your time? (If you’re here, I’m guessing it’s to finally launch your outdoor business 😄 )